Profess thy idiocy. NOW.

I swear, it's like some of my professors are employed for the sole purpose of annoying the living crap out of us. It's not what they assign, it's not what they cover in class. It's THEM! Let's talk about my Computer Science 2 professor, he's an idiot.

No, really. He's gotten marginally smarter since the class started... wait, that's a lie. Just last week I had to correct him on something. I have no idea how he got tenured, but I suspect it was around the time when he actually knew how to program. Since then he's forgotten what the first line is in 90% of these programs, dropped semicolons where the students don't.... for those of you who don't program, let me sum this up in terms you'd understand: THIS GUY SHOULDN'T BE TEACHING HIGH SCHOOL CLASSES, LET ALONE COLLEGE. Arrrgh.

Last week a kid was having a bug of some sort. He tells the guy to bring it up and hook it up to the projector to see what was going on. (Translated: Hey, maybe the students will fix this, I sure as heck can't. Yeah, well, we could, if you'd listen to us!) I already knew the gist of what was wrong before he went up, and the minute I saw his program, I knew exactly what to fix. "Do this" I say. "Wait, he shouldn't need to, because this is a specific version of that!" the professor says. It's bad for your grades to say "You. Are. A. MORON!", apparently, so this time I stuck with "No, it's NOT, it's what I'm saying it is." Cue the student himself saying the professor isn't right, but not knowing what to fix anymore because I'm being contradicted 10 times a minute! Why am I even taking this class?! I could be teaching it!

I mean, most of us make a point of ignoring him in class at this point. We actually get dumber if we pay attention. Read the book, understand the concept, and then forget what you're supposed to do because his explanation sucks. Wait, I'm sorry. I got that wrong. His explanation sucks, he does it wrong the first 4 times, and by the 5th time you're confused. This guy is a hazard. Just today he gave us an open-note quiz, but not "open-neighbor". Then he had us take the thing on our laptops, with wireless capability. I'm not saying people cheated- I sure didn't, because obviously I don't need any help with this class- but come on. At least PRETEND you care. Then again, only the idiots would think of going on chat to try and cheat, and they're all too dumb to help each other.

You, the idiots that didn't turn in any homework and had no idea what to do as a result. I'm talking about you, knowing full well that one of you will read this eventually. No offense.... OK, I'm lying, here at Samcasm I don't care who I offend. STUPID MOVE! If this weren't a rant about the prof I'd tear you to shreds too! Homework is 40% of the grade for the class and you're not even pretending to try, morons.


Back on the subject of ignoring him, there's only one time I paid attention on purpose in the last month, and that was for our caffeine drinking game. That's right, this guy is so bad we ended out making up a drinking game- around caffeinated beverages- just for him. Take one when he makes a mistake, five for an ambiguous assignment, and so forth... I think if you inspire a drinking game of any kind you should take a serious look at what you're doing. (Caffeine and not alcohol because let's face it, if you take a metabolic poison as a recreational drug in the first place, you're an idiot. If you do it in a class, I'm going to convince you to jump out the window because you're the kind of idiot I'm sick of dealing with.) Let's just say that by the end of class, I was ridiculously hyper and I had to take a trip to the bathroom.

I was also going to write about our new substitute that'll be around for 2 weeks, at least, but this is long enough already and he just got in here. So I'll probably write ANOTHER "professor is dumb" rant after that.

I swear I'd stop showing up if we weren't being counted for attendance.